Practicing Non-Attachment

Simplicity.... Patience.... Compassion

Why do we get attached to certain things, 
certain situations or ideas about life?

These last two weeks have left me wondering about my own personal journey and all its trappings.  We are beginning to clean out my mother-in-laws home. I can't tell you how wonderful it is to sit and look through the many treasures she and her husband (also deceased) collected over the years. I don't know all of the stories, but if I don't my husband or another family member will stop and take me through an event, often in great detail. I can picture it as I hold this treasure. And yet, I also wonder why we hold onto "things" that when we leave this world, or no longer need them, we struggle to let go. 

Many of their belongings will get passed onto their children, their grandchildren, and even their great-grandchildren. The difficult decision will be what to do with those items that don't seem to find a home. I remember this when my parents passed away and my brothers and sisters found ourselves at an impasse. Some items were easy to say yes to and others brought out debates. Ultimately, decisions were made and we moved on. 

I see this tug of war as I reflect on my own life. What do I hold onto and what do I let go. When I leave this world my family will have to take on this same task. Though I am writing about physical belongings one can also apply this idea to our views, situations that may impact us, even our hopes and dreams. We can work to accept situations as they are, to open up ourselves to the experience. Through this we will empower ourselves to live relationships with love & intensity. 

     Evelyn Lim wrote an essay entitled, " How to Practice Non-Attachment." Within her article she presented tools that we might use to work on being objective and not clinging onto ideas, things or situations in life. First, Lim believes that we need to Focus on the Present: when we are attached to a desire, our mind is in the future and not on the present. When you focus on the present, you focus on what can be done right at this moment. Secondly, She suggests that we need to Give Up the Hows: as we focus on our dream, we need to stop fretting over how it is going to happen. Don't be rigid, but remain open to the opportunities. Thirdly, Lim says that we need to Refrain from Obsessing Over Numbers: focusing on numbers creates a feeling of attachment. How often do you find yourself checking your emails, or checking to see how many students you have in your yoga class (I do this way to often). When I do this and the numbers are not good, immediately I place a value on myself. Talk about not healthy. 

Lim goes on to the fourth tool when she says that we should work to, Adopt the Attitude of  Learning:  As a teacher for many years I worked to bring out in the students I taught the love of learning. For most History was not a subject they readily would take, so I worked to show them that the actual art of learning could bring out more than just the subject itself.  The process was where the learning occurred and not the product they turned in. Lim believes that "life becomes exciting in it mystery, possibility and adventure." 

If we become attached we may be unwilling to let life unfold as it should. In other words, Be Okay with Uncertainity.  I find the next tool one that can be difficult for me The Art of Allowing, "to live in joy no matter what's happening around me." I don't need to fix or change or put a label on anything. I just need to be.  Lastly, Lim writes about Using Energy Release Methods to help us with letting go of attachments. For me, this one will be a work in progress. Using meridian tapping to help be become present and reduce the frustrations that may arise. I will have to do more research on this tool. Take yourself through these seven tools and allow yourself to take a look at each with no judgement, with no attachments. 

     I like the sequence I designed below as it requires the practitioner to let go of their reservations about how they might complete an asana, or worry about how they might look. This sequence allows you to just be. Allow yourself to accept and open yourself to the experience. 

Resources: 
https://www.evelynlim.com/how-to-practice-non-attachment-in-7-ways/
quote photo: https://themindsjournal.com/im-practicing-non-attachment-2/